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Today we talk to the Badass Buddha about all things being yourself. Dr. Lori learned about the Law of Attraction and was thrown off by thinking she attracted all of this. She owned it and is not using it to empower herself and now others. If you are unwill to admit your role in your life, then you can’t expect other things to show up in your life.
It becomes very empowering. And when then when you look at that through your whole life, personal life, your business life, any element of yourself, your mental, your emotional, your spirituality, whatever, it’s, if you know that this is the choice that your making. By owning the choice and the direction and if it doesn’t go the way you want it to you can shift it is. This practice becomes freeing.
Dr. Lori Monaco is the founder and CEO of Align Yourself Inc. She is an authenticity teacher, speaker, and coach, and a Chiropractic Physician. She specializes in mindfulness practice and transformation. Known as the Badass Buddha and the Fat Eviction Specialist she is the creator of “The 7 Core Pillars of Alignment” where she teaches people how to love more, laugh more, live more, be happy, be real, take charge of their health, and to create peace and harmony within, to live a more fulfilled life. Her other programs include B.L.A.S.T. VIP and group coaching, the “Evict the Fat” wellness program, and various workshops for educators, corporate, and laypeople (online and in-person).
She is the cohost of the show “Viva Café con Leche” and BlogTalkRadio Show “Viva Moms After Dark”. Lori has written articles for a multitude of magazines and is currently working on her own book. She lectures locally and throughout the country and coaches remotely connecting with clients around the world.
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welcome to the podcast badass Buddha, aka Dr. Lori. Hi, everybody. I’m so glad to be here. And thanks for having me, Jennifer. Whoo. Right, get this party started. So I want to ask my favorite question, which is in this moment, right now, what is that thing that’s firing you up? Oh, like a hard one at me?
No, let’s see what’s firing me up, um, possibilities. That’s what’s firing me up, I just got back from a three week, badass possibilities tour. And that’s like a fancy way of saying, I went to see what the potential The possibilities are for me to relocate. And I took my two kids with me boldly, in a car for three weeks with my two dogs. And what really it was, it was to get out of the comfort zone on our own and explore for different states. So possibilities are still range, you know, that’s the part that’s on fire for me right now. Because there’s so many possibilities out there I did, I set the intention of finding a place to relocate. I’m located in Connecticut. And my goal was to relocate somewhere else other than here. And I did, and that’s the irony of it is that I found the place but there’s two, there’s, there’s multiple possibilities and the timeframe. And so it’s exciting. And at the same time, there’s a little piece of me that’s like, chomping at the bit cuz I’m like ready to like, like,
go universe set me free. Tell me what, you know, give me some direction here. So. But yeah, that’s what it is. It’s I’m on fire about possibilities. And not just for me, for my children. And for my clients and for everybody that I’m constantly in contact with.
And possibilities. That’s such a huge topic, because I know that over the last, we’re just going to say in the last 18 months or a year, wherever we’re at that possibilities and that hope and the things have kind of been sucked back from us. So what made you other than the possibility of relocating? Like, how did you get brave enough, I’m going to call it brave to go out and say, I’m just going to relocate, and do the thing and seek the new possibility. I know the story.
And then technically, it’s been stages, though, because so the first part was Be brave enough to get in the car, and drive. And while I did have a woman that I met through networking, she’s a travel advisor, she’s I just I plotted the course. And I said, I want to stop here. I want to stop here overnight, and then hear for a few days and check out this place. She like put it all together for me, but but to get in the car and drive and pack up the stuff and say we’re gonna be gone for three weeks, and I got the two dogs and one dog is kind of a hard to travel with. And so it I don’t know, you know, everybody keeps saying to me, wow, that was really brave of you that was really like to get out there. And all it reminded me was the fact that so I’m 51. And it reminded me of the fact that I used to do this in my 20s like, I would just get in the car. The only difference is my car was so much better now. And it’s like so like, you know, people Oh, well, this could happen. And this could happen. Yeah, but maybe it won’t happen. I mean, it’s not going to happen. You know, like when I was in my 20s I was just getting my car with like, 150,000 miles on it don’t even know when the last time I had an oil change shop tires. Oh, I’m sorry. I’m supposed to replace those every so often. And like I just got in? Is my gas tank filled? Oh, good. How much money do I have? Well, I got enough for a couple of checks. You know, Phil’s I mean, and you go, you know, Now granted, I didn’t have kids, but have my dogs. And you just went and you just you know, you threw caution to the wind and then you get older and you’re like, you’re always overthinking. So that was the only piece to me that was the brave piece was just to say, Okay, I’m just gonna trust in the process. And if if something goes wrong, it goes wrong. But if it doesn’t go wrong, you know, if, if something does go wrong, I can shift and be flexible. You know,
I love that. And that shift is so important. And I think that that takes a lot of, of knowing who you are to be able to be flexible. And I know that’s one of your big things that you love sharing about is that like peace of authenticity of like owning like, Oh, I have to shift I have to pivot I have to you know, like it’s not always conforming
well and that’s life. So shifting, okay, so that’s, that’s actually a really a good point because you The thing is, you never know what’s going to happen like we can anticipate and you know, they’ll or they’ll or make assumptions, you know, and I love that expression and, you know, making assumptions makes an ass out of you and me. We live our life that way. We there’s there’s nothing wrong with assumptions. There’s Just that you have to know that they there’s a posit, there’s always a possibility that it won’t work out the way you, you know, you’re planning. So So for instance, I mean, I base that trip on an assumption, I mean, I made an assumption that we’re going to get to our destination unscathed, that we’re going to, we’re not going to have any car trouble, we’re gonna it’s going to be an easy drive, you know, and so you say those things, just like getting on a plane, you’re gonna make an assumption that you’re going to get to your next destination that the pilots are going to be sober and doing their thing and, and, you know, but and there’s nothing wrong with that. But then you say, and you have to be careful with this, because I’m really big fan of law of attraction and the universe in that, that you don’t say, but just in case because the universe is funny like that a universe doesn’t say, I like hearing but because then because it ships, you say, and I am ready to shift.
Good, it go in a different direction. And you leave it open like that you kind of leave it if not defined as what direction over just in case, like I got pulled over twice on the on the ride, right and, and thank God, they were both gorgeous, like gorgeous state troopers, one in Illinois and one in Wyoming, there’s nothing better than getting pulled over by a hot looking like individual. So whatever your taste is, I you know, no, whatever. But as long as the person is hot looking and just make anyone if they gave me the ticket, I would have been like, thank you, you’re so good looking. But anyway, so I got pulled over for having a cover on my on the the car that I was using, it actually wasn’t even my car. And it was a cover for the license plate. And I got a warning, I just got a verbal warning for the first one and a written warning for the second note ticket, you know, and I looked at that, and we ended up chatting like 10 minutes chatting with the state troopers. And I looked at it like, this is fine. And I remember very vividly, when I saw the lights behind me. I was like the first one, I was like, Oh my gosh, was I speeding a little bit because I know the speed limits really high over there. And I thought I was you know, kept changing back and forth. But I went into a going, if I get a ticket, I get a ticket, like I was speeding and I did something wrong, that’s fine. You know, it’s lesson learned and be more aware. And you know, and hopefully, blah, blah, blah. I hadn’t had a ticket ever in my life, you know. So I went that and the second time around, it was just like, I know, I’m not speeding. So it’s got to be that that license plate cover. And then of course, the next destination I took the license plate cover off, but but in the end, I think that’s the reality of it is is that when you, you just know, and you’re aware, you just go you just ship, you know, and you say and you played scenarios, you had to say, Well, if I break down, and this is what I do, and if I and if I get to my destination, this is what I’m gonna do. And I was grateful every moment. like, Dude, what’s the beautiful day, the less you know, there’s no traffic. Thank you for that, you know, thank you for the scenery. So I don’t remember what you asked me Now see, this is what I do. I just love it,
keep going. I think that that that that can play into like any aspect of life is that keep going and just kind of being in the flow. And I bet your adventure. Even if with the little hiccups of being pulled over. At least you were they were attractive, right? It was like,
Oh, this is a nice little stopover. Well, we wanted to rest for a few minutes. So yeah.
So when it comes to, to going through these paths, and like you just talked about law of attraction, and shifting the way that we’re thinking about things like for me, I’m leaving tomorrow on an airplane and I’m like, Oh, she said airplane and then my mind me that he goes oh no, what if she’s gonna say like, your plane doesn’t make it to a destination that was like immediate thought I was like, Don’t say that. Please don’t say that. And then I’m like, oh, but what if it does?
What can we do that we say what? Because we do tend to go to the negative. And it’s been proven with research that we negative thoughts are actually much more predominant in our brain than positive thoughts. And so sometimes just saying, I’m gonna think positively, you know, it’s just like saying, Oh, I’m going to fail this test or think positive, okay, I’m positive, I’m going to fail the test, you know. So it’s like you, you you say, you know, what if I don’t get to my destination, but what if I do, this is what you say, you say, I’m going to get to my destination, there’s going to be a fabulous flight, and I’m going to have an amazing time. And if there are other alternatives, if or if other things occur, I’m shifting maybe, and I will just go with the flow. And you know, and I think that when we really take that mindset that we just it opens ourselves, we open ourselves up to possibilities, that of course we can’t even think of so Let’s say something, you know, something odd happened. And then you end up striking up a conversation with the person next to you. And then you find out that this individual, you know, because of the little odd thing that happened, that’s what started the conversation with the person and then you end up finding out this person is like, some Global Head of this, and, and then hey, you know, Jennifer, that sounds great. I want to hear about your podcast, and I’m gonna blah, blah, blah. And then you’re like, what just happened, you know, like, what just happened, and it and it occurs because it just something else triggered it. And whether it was a positive or negative triggered it, you know. And so it’s, it’s one of those things where you just again, if you adopt that mindset that, you know, I like, right now I’m reading, I read a lot of books, and one of the books that I’m reading now is Marie Forleo is everything is figure out a bowl, which is, I love her anyway, she’s just the way she speaks the way she writes. And it’s just I resonate completely with her and a lot of us do, because she’s so authentic, and she’s so real, and so straightforward. So, she, she’s talking about, like, everything is figure out a bubble. And that so if you always have that mindset in your head, you will always be able to think, you know, just, there’s always, there’s always a solution. And I think what we’re hell bent on all the time is that we, we always say, well, it’s going to be within our parameters. So if I’m going to shift and I’m going to do this, it’s within my parameters. So I’m willing to do this, but that’s not and so we put these, like, we put these boundaries that say that I’m not willing to, you know, I’m going to shift like, Listen, if you’re going to shift, you got to let shift happen. Like, that’s just that you have to let it happen. And you have to know that I will always find a way, I will always find a way. And we do that. And that’s the irony behind it, we always find that the problem is, is that we say to ourselves that I’m disappointed because that wasn’t the way I wanted it. Like I shifted, and I found a way but that wasn’t that’s the disappointment is, it may not be the way you want it to be. But there’s always a reason for it. Right? So it may it makes it so much easier that way when you when you trust in the process, and you know, the universe is leading you, and that you surrender to that you will always go where you need to go. And let me tell you, I did not always have that mindset. I mean, you know, I never really knew what the law of attraction was. And you know, that expression, misery loves company, I was miserable. I was a miserable mother ever. I mean, I was I was happy one minute and miserable the other and I was at depression and very moody. And I realized that after it because I hit my real low point I like, hit a six month depression. And I was suicidal for three weeks. And this was only some 51 this is only like six almost six years ago, so wasn’t even that long ago. And I wasn’t even young, you know, like it was it was like middle age, my whole world exploded. I wasn’t expecting it. And I came close. But then I said,
know what, I can’t do that. That’s not going to work for me. I have kids blah, blah, blah. And it was the moment that I said, Okay, I’m owning this like I am when I look back and I say oh, this this my life didn’t go this way didn’t go any other way I really wanted it to what’s the common factor? It was me, you know, like, Oh, now I didn’t take responsibility for anybody else’s, you know, crap. I just said, Okay, well, what, what do I have to change? And then I said, and then when I learned about the law of attraction, and I went, Oh, my God, I attracted all this, I’m like, Oh, really, you know, so if you but if you know that, and you’re unwilling to admit that, then you know that you can attract something else, or you can undo things. So it becomes very empowering. And when then when you look at that through your whole life, like whether it’s your, your personal life, your business life, you know, any element of yourself, your mental, your emotional, your spirituality, whatever, it’s, if you know that this is the choice that I’m making, and I’m owning the choice and the direction and if it doesn’t go the way I want it to I could shift it is. In the end, it’s you’re not really you’re controlling, but you’re not controlling. And and it’s so empowering. And it’s so freeing, because all that time when I would be in my headspace going, No, I want it to go this way. And I wanted to go into what the total opposite way. That was the irony of it. All of a sudden, when I started to just trusting the process and say, Well, this is what I want, this is what I want, and you start putting that out there and all of a sudden, you start to get it. And I love those moments. Like I would get a phone call and I’d be like I really want this you know, because I’m a speaker. So it’s like I really want the speaking gig or something like that. And so all of a sudden out of the blue, so I’m gonna go call me and they’ll be like, Oh, yeah, this is so and so and, and I and I’m on the phone and and they don’t see me thank God and I’m going you know, like, Oh my god, this is great. And then Did I hang up? And then I’m like, What just happened? What was that? Like? Who? How did they find me? Who was that? Like, why did they call me? I can’t believe this, you know, and those I love those moments, because we, you know, like, you don’t, when they happen, we tend to as adults just, you know, that was very cool, you know, as opposed to be like a little tie. I mean, like, you know, but you bring that energy to you, because that’s that we’re all energy. So it’s like, you just, you put it out there, you change your mindset, you shift. And it just flows. And if they’re not kidding, when they say, Well, I manifested, I thought of 15 $100. And the next thing I know, is 15 $100 in my account, and it’s like, really, you know, and then you do it once or twice, and you’re like, holy crap, really work? I guess I’ll keep going.
That’s awesome. So because I have all the questions right now, but one of them that keeps sticking out of my mind is like the call for the stages. What was your favorite speaking gig or whatever appearance? I’m not sure what to call it? Well, the
irony was that my favorite one and was actually in the beginning, one of my worst ones, I was asked to speak for mind body, and I don’t it’s a mind body is a international company. And they were doing a call for speakers and they were having this just three day events. I didn’t get to the three day event, but I got a different speaking gig, it was online, whatever. But they still they have like 1000s of people coming on and you know, whatever. And I was so excited. I had a 30 minute slot very excited about this is this is this is gonna put me you know, like catapult me and blah, blah, blah. And I got I said to my kids just don’t get online. This was early on this was like, this was like, I think it was 2018. And I said to my kids, you know, don’t get online, bla bla bla, and my middle one totally disregarded what I said, and she must be got online, and our internet wasn’t great. And all of a sudden, 10 minutes in, I get booted off and I’m like, Oh, you know, the lady next to me? Where are you? Like, what are you got? You froze, and I’m like, Oh my god, I’m trying to get out. I’m like, panic, um, you know, and this was before I was at that level of just shift, you know, like that everything happens for a reason. And I got back on but then I was all disheveled. I lost my train of thought and then five minutes into it, boom, off again. And then I get the text from her and says, Listen, don’t worry about it. It’s it is what it is. And I was like, Oh my god, oh my god, I just lost it. Like that was a that was that. And, you know, before you really changed your, your, your mindset. And even even when you do because you’re always transformation is lifelong. So you’re always getting better. You’re always challenged, and you’re, you know, you see what you still need to work on. But I remember calling my text message My friend and I wanted so badly to have somebody give me a pity party like I was I just wanted to complain and go, Oh my God, my kid, I can’t believe this. I’ve lost my blah, blah, blah, this is this and that. And there’s my one chance, Chris, it’s never one chance. And I text us or you wouldn’t believe what happened, blah, blah, blah. And she sends me this text message back. And she says, And what did you learn. And I was so mad at her I was so mad, I’m like looking at the phone, I’m giving her the thing, double finger and I’m going you know, and I took a breath for a second. And I went and I text her what I learned, you know, and and and I said and I just want to know I hate you right now, you know, and I put an lol. But it what ended up being my most exciting, like I put it on such a pedestal with came crashing down but became one of my greatest, you know, stories and one of my greatest learning experiences. And from that point going forward whenever I would get,
um, you know, I because I do a lot of I don’t speak so much internationally, but I definitely speak domestically. And I will get like big companies or whatever and, and now when I get them, I’m just you know, I’m always I always get excited, of course, but I get great on the gratitude piece of huge and I always walk in, say whether it’s live or online and say the same thing that I’m great. I’m grateful if one person shows up, I’m grateful if it’s 1000s of people. All I know is that this is I’m just always going to give the best version of me. So for me, they’re all fabulous. Like they’re absolutely every single one is fabulous. It doesn’t matter if it’s you know, Billy Joe, Jim Bob’s, you know, podcast and you know, whatever and these got to listeners or if it’s like something you know somebody else and because that’s where the authentic piece came in. It’s about once I decided who I was and film Love with myself. That’s all I bring to the table now, you know, and of my friend and co host and the one that said that, you know, very insightful thing in the text. You know, she always likes to say I’m not everybody’s cup of tea, that and so good thing I drink coffee and and it’s but it’s true. It’s like, I’m not everybody, everybody’s cup of tea. I mean I I do have a personality that it gets along with a lot of people. But I’m not a like I’m silly I could be as deep and serious as possible, but I’m really I do have I take great joy in making people laugh. And it’s not that I have to make them laugh for my own benefit. It’s it just brings me joy. So I love to be funny. And and it and I do it all the time. And not everybody’s, you know, they’d always like my jokes, you know, so. But I just, I don’t care as long as I meet, you know, as long as I’d so if you don’t like that, and you don’t like me, then that’s okay. And there’s something wrong with you, obviously. But No, I’m just kidding. But it’s just, it’s it’s just, you know, I don’t have to hide behind anything and be like, you know, so. So that’s why like every single speaking gig and I love, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, I love talking. are you even here? Are you good? Like I like I could just keep going like for hours. I always joke and say one of these days, I’m going to get on my social media and just do like a social media filibuster. And just like talk about anything for like eight hours straight. I think that’s the max, you can go on Facebook is eight hours straight. But if it’s just it’s such a privilege to be able to speak anywhere, and I even better in person, like when I’m alive in person. It’s it’s crazy time. It’s it’s fun time like we dance. And so I can’t wait for those to come back. But every single one is an absolute pleasure. So it’s that that’s the only one that sticks out, though, because of the lesson behind that one.
The lesson that you weren’t happy at first, though. But how cool is that to have somebody that called you out? Like that is so awesome. I’d be so annoyed. But I eventually I probably wouldn’t have gotten back to them as quickly as
well. And you know what’s funny, so she and I co host a show on YouTube and Facebook. And then she had just posted something too about what best friends are. And I wish I could pull it up really quickly. But I don’t think I can get to it that rapidly. Because it was so it was so so good. But no, I don’t think I can. But it was something that said something like best friends, like you’re in it for the fun. And then I don’t even want to screw it up the quote. But yeah, but that’s what friends are. That when you become big. When you step into yourself. And you you embrace your greatness and you love yourself Good, bad and ugly. And then you put that out there that energy you attract those people in your life, you know, and you attract the people that are going to be that honest with you. And you’re going to be honest with them. Because you could turn around and say, You know what, I don’t want a lesson right now I just want a friend or you can vocalize it, you know, like if I wanted to like and I said it’s where I said I so wanted a pity party from you. And you just you wouldn’t let me have it. She goes, You know, I would have let you have it. But at that moment, that’s what I needed to say to you. I said that’s what I needed to hear. And I was grateful for it, you know, but But no, we have our moments like she’ll she knows when, you know, we’ll have our moments of and we’ll we’ll put timers on it, you know, alright, let’s let’s do a pity party right now. And we only have like 20 minutes, you know, or bitch fest or whatever you want to call it. So, but yeah, that’s that’s the beauty of your tribe. And when you really own you, those are the beautiful people that you’ll attract like Like I said earlier misery loves company. So you wonder why you’re about everybody around you is miserable. It’s because you attracted them, even family, even family you know, and family is a little bit more complicated. But you will start to notice that as you shift they won’t have time they won’t want to be bothered with you anymore because you’re no more fun. Like oh my god remember we used to complain about you know, people and talk gossip about and you’re like you no fun anymore because you don’t do that. It’s like lying, you know, and then move on you know?
I think that’s amazing. And that is so true is I I’ve lost a lot of people when I started shifting because I am like when I started embracing the perfectly imperfect entrepreneur, which is my brand I’m like, Nope, I’m just this silly crazy if I can play with a five year old I will get down to their level. I am fine with that. And just it did it shifted a lot of people out of
which was the best thing ever. Right and You know, sometimes we sometimes they’ll go naturally, sometimes you got to kick them out. And and then interestingly, sometimes they shift back in after, because here’s the thing they know you as you are. So they you’ve, and this is our fault, we’ve taught them to treat us the way where they treat us because we taught them that, you know, and so once you shift that doesn’t fit into their little world anymore. So that means that they have to, they have to change themselves. So they have to, they have to alter something, and some just can’t deal with that. They’re like, Oh, god, this isn’t gonna work for me, you, you know, you’re not the same person. You were Yes, that was the point, you know. And so you, but it’s interesting when people like, I remember my transition, I had a best friend, we weren’t really considered best friends, they were but we’ve known each other for years. And we were close friends. And I mother after out, like she, she just was saying all the wrong things. And I was in such a really, really bad state. And she was not being compassionate whatsoever, at least my interpretation. And so I said, things I had never said before. I mean, I never used the F word so much in an email in my life. And, and we stopped talking, we stopped talking for a couple of years. And actually, I think, four. And then slowly she started, he put herself back in, you know, and it wasn’t me that said, Oh, um, so it was, you know, I mean, she came back in, and I’ve, you know, not that I’ve been cautious. I just said, Well, we’ll see where it goes, you know? And it’s interesting, because she’s different, you know, and is she different person in general, I don’t know, we’re not that close again, yet. But she’s different towards me. Because she knows I’m different. And I already know that because I shift so much. And I just go with the flow that I know that if any little bit of piece comes back that that is any resemblance of how our relationship used to be before, I’m either going to call her out on it, or I’m just going to be like, I’m out. Because I know me, and I’m never gonna, I’m not going back there. And I’m, I refuse to let people pull me in. But yeah, it is. And I think sometimes that’s why people don’t change. Because they don’t really want to get rid of those relationships, even even as toxic as they are. They just, that’s all they know. So they just don’t want to change if they want with business or business or could be failing, and we’re going down with the ship, but but we just we just we don’t, that’s all we know. And it’s like, okay, but just take a different perspective, you know, and take a step back. And maybe you do have to let that ship sink, so that the dinghy floats up to the top and you you know, use that to get somewhere else.
Yeah, cuz there might be a beautiful beach on the other side that you can only get to with your Disney movie. Absolutely. A guy had to leave that big ship out there. So you can enjoy the beach. Right? Exactly. And it’s,
it’s freeing, you know, it’s it’s just, you know, it’s it’s the reason we are the way we are when we fight for those, you know, mediocre lives. It’s because that’s how we were raised. You know, we were, we were raised with the belief system. And then we want to fight so badly to keep that belief system until you get dangled a couple of times in front of you where you’re like, this is, you know, this is the possibility and that’s why people are so we don’t press in ourselves. We we people go to psychics, people go to Tarot readers, and I don’t say there’s anything wrong with them. I have actually friends that are psychics and Tarot readers. It’s, it’s the thing that people want, they can’t they don’t want to trust in themselves for the decision. They’d rather like, oh, let me go to the tarot reader. And let me let me see if they think that I’m on the right track, you know, and rather than, and then if, and then if they go on their head in the end. And the interesting thing is that the parallel card reader or the psychic says, Oh, I see you traveling and you changing your job. And in their head, they’re going oh, I was thinking of traveling and changing my job. And all of a sudden, they get this, this, you know, this push to do it. And then they say to themselves, I’ll see cuz that’s, that’s what the tarot card reader said, I was a psychic, you created it, you just base it on a belief. That’s what it was, you believed what they said. So it’s it. But that’s, that’s what it comes down to. It’s always based on belief. And it’s always based on, you know, the deep set stuff when we were younger, and it takes so much time to back, you know, reverse it and really learn the good stuff, you know, so and as a mom, you know, I, I’m constantly thick tobacco and I look at like so I have a 27 year old a 17 and a seven year old. So I’ll let everybody just ponder that one for a minute. And the seven year old got the best version of me. She She was he was only two when I hit my rock bottom. So in my transition spot She was at that peak age. So she’s, she’s, she has a different me, my 17 year old had a different me. And my 27 year old had a different main, my 17 year old got me when I was at my lowest point. And as a result, she has depression, she has anxiety, she’s really not in a great state, and we’re working really hard to help her. But I look back at that as a parent, and because I love to, you know, I step back a lot of times, and I just become very present and aware of my surroundings. And again, it’s about accountability is mindful mindfulness practice. And I look at that, and I go, you know, damage control, it’s like the damage was done with the 17 year old. So it can’t go back in time, you can’t fix it, you know, but you have to just do what you can at this moment in time and fix what you can. So the goal always is to say, I just want to always have a great mindset and go write it and be, you know, this mindful parent and, and, you know, and, or you just could say, I’m just gonna try not to screw them up to too much, you know, and then inflect on them what I know now, and not just say it, but do it. You know, and so that was with that, the trip that I took the badass possibilities tour that I just took for myself for three weeks with the two of them, you know, I got hit with, this is great possibility to hear, I’m going to go here, I’m checking out the state, the state the state, and then sitting next to me where my where my old habits because there’s the one like the 17 year old is barely engaging me she has her headphones, and she’s not talking to me almost the entire trip, you know. And, and not because she didn’t want to just because she just she or she was mad at me it was just because she didn’t feel like it. You know, it was no big deal. But I’m thinking but look at this, like, look where we are, you’re not looking, you’re not paying attention, because she was going off the old knee that just sort of glazed through life with with blinders on, you know, or Eyes Wide Shut. That’s what I like to say that I went through most of my adult life, eyes wide shot, not seeing what really was in front of me and not paying attention. And that’s why my life imploded as it did, and it ended up becoming the best thing that ever happened to me. It’s just like, it’s just like, that’s that speaking gig. Sometimes the worst pieces, the the lowest points in our life end up being the greatest moments of our life. And and if you’re thinking that that’s the lowest, you know, that could be, then it’s all up from there, you know, so any struggle that you have, it’s not nearly as bad as it was. And now you’re a different person, so it won’t get that bad again. And no matter even if if something seems like it’s going down, you always find your way out.
That’s amazing. So is that the time that the badass Buddha was, was came to life? I have to know because I that’s like one of the questions I have to ask. I’m like, let’s just to call a spade a spade I’m like, and it said badass Buddha, do you want that us but it’d be on your app. Yes, I’d like her to come on and
fill that out with any networking group. I go on. I put, I used to start off with my name. And then I said, aka badass boot. And then I said that with that I’m actually the badass Buddha. So I put that and I put aka just like it says on the on the screen. And so that came out. So it actually it was it was put it was formulated a little over a year ago when we put together the show that we do on Facebook and YouTube. And my my name drop and if you want Oh, that’s fine, would be great. So if you look up Vic on Lucha, it’s real talk. It’s real talk over a cup of coffee with lots of love and laughter. So the mic co host she said something along the lines that she used the name Gladiator guru before and that maybe we’ll use nicknames. And I’m like, Oh my God, that’s a great idea. So let’s do that. So bass Buddha came in, because three years before that, I started a blog post where I started it, but I never actually really pushed it. And then I ended up switching the name but the blog post was called the compassionate badass, right? And because that’s how I viewed myself definitely a compassionate person all my life, the ban as I was walking into, like, I was trying to step into it, and I was a little uncomfortable because it’s a bold term, you know? And, but I said, No, that’s, that’s why I’m convincing myself. I’m going to be the compassionate about us. And then I follow a group called mind, Valley and mind. It’s a great organization. They have all kinds of big, big platform. And the founder, vishen lakhiani, came out with a book. Well, I was looking at it one day, it’s a second book and said, The Buddha and the badass and I went, Oh my God, that’s it. Like, I’m the badass Buddha, you know, and it wasn’t. It wasn’t that I was copying him. It was just all of a sudden it clicked for me to say that describes me. It describes me the I am a Buddha, I am an individual who’s always been very compassionate and loving and kind and always looking for the good, you know, always, you know, in that direction, though a little misguided over the years because of my old mindset, but that was always the premise, kind hearted there, you know, wholehearted person, but there’s a badass piece was really with the transition, like my transformation and never thought I was a badass and and even with you know, gins and sheroes book you are a badass and hearing these terms and saying it I still when i would i would cringe sometimes in the beginning of my broadcast, like the first few months, I would say the badass Buddha and I would be like, you know, I would shrink a little bit. But you’d be like, I’m not really a badass, I’m not really about us. And then one day I said to myself, you know what, we all are badasses. You will not you just have to own it. And I and I sat there and I kept saying it over and over again, the badass boot or the badass but I said you know what? I am, because nobody else is going to be that in your life except you you you have got to decide to be the badass in your life. Just like Jensen Jarrow says. And when I finally said that’s it, I am the badass in my life, like meaning that I am my authentic self, I am off, but I am soft at the same time but in you know, all in all positive ways. And that’s when I started actually using it outside of the broadcast. And even my business coach, you know, one day I actually had put it in there and and that was when I still doing like Dr. Laura Monaco, aka badass Buddha. She’s like, are you sure you want to like put that on there? I don’t think she even made it. Like she showed it on me. She’s like, I don’t know, I don’t think you should do that, you know? And I fought for it. I said, Nope, sorry. It’s not negotiable. I’m not going to take that off. Because that was like the first time I’ve ever kind of stepped in and bought for something that usually I was just like, well, maybe that’s a good idea. You know, I’ll take that in consideration, Bob, especially with the business coach. But when I said, Nope, non negotiable. That’s it. And she was like, Okay, then I was like, Oh, damn, that easy. I could just sit there and stand up for myself. And it’s that easy. And the I love the it’s such a it’s such a conversation starter. You know, I’ll be on a network thing with like, 50 people, and somebody always says, I want to talk to the badass Buddha, you know, and I get a kick out of that. And it’s not an attention seeking thing. It’s really me and it and it’s, and so when they say that I’m like, happy to talk to you, you know, but there are some people that really don’t like it, there’s some people that it repels them. And you know what? Perfect, then I don’t have to repel them. The name does it. And I that’s not.
anytime they’re ready to come back, it’s fine. If they if they understood it, I think they would get past the badass piece. You know,
like you said before, you’re not everyone’s cup of tea. So it’s perfect, right?
That’s right. And I think again, you know, I don’t my goal is not to, you know, I was a people pleaser, you know, so many of us are raised that way. And we don’t even realize we’re being raised that way. And I was such a people pleaser. And I was so upset when people not everybody liked me and, but the reality is, is because we’re perfectly imperfect. We won’t fit in with everybody. And that’s okay. You know, and the moment we let go of that, like, I want everybody to like me, I it’s really important to me, do this, the first new the one and the most important thing, the one and only thing first. You like you, because that because that’s really what it is. If you’re so worried about everybody else liking you the question you’re asking yourself, do I really like me? And most of the time, I would say I would say probably 99.9% of time or whatever the birth control pill. efficacy is. I would say that, that that’s really what it is. If you’re a people pleaser, and you’re worried about people liking you, it’s because the question is do you really like yourself? And and I didn’t I mean, you know, when I finally admitted that, oh, it’s like, okay, yeah, I don’t Alright, so what am I like, and then I got to change it. So what needs to change? So you mentioned the business coach, where you tell us a little bit about what you do.
So I am so the doctor piece. It’s a very expensive piece. That’s the only reason I use it. Or if somebody pisses me off, I usually throw the doctor out there. Oh, this is Dr. Laurie. Um, it’s I’m a chiropractic physician by training. You know, by trade. I’ve been a chiropractor for oh my gosh, 2020 years over 22 years. So those of you that are watching Yes, I hard to believe I graduated when I was 10. So the chiropractic physician for that long and then about In chiropractic school, I became a speaker because that they taught us that in the school, they wanted us to be like, you know, teaching patients and blah, blah, blah. And I love public speaking like I, I took my first public speaking class, I was like a sophomore in high school. So that was beautiful, right? And then, and then about two years in, I started teaching, I started teaching, human anatomy physiology, pathophysiology, neuro anatomy, physiology in post secondary, but it was a trade school, but but the, the coursework was really it was like, it was college coursework. And that I love like, that was it like that was I love teaching, that’s my thing. But then after my awakening, I made a promise to myself that as I’m pulling myself out of this, and learning all this and saying, I said to myself, you know, what, if I’m gonna do this, I’m gonna pull myself out, I refuse to let other people feel the way I felt and be that low. So I got to give back and I want to be a coach. So and you know, most coaches become coaches, because they’ve had some sort of epiphany or life change, you know, so. And so that was it. But I gotta tell you, though, honestly, the thing that I embraced the most, though, truly is my is the teaching, like, I, I really feel the teaching element of it, like, I can sit there. And, you know, somebody says to me, Well, why do we have a mindset like that? Why, you know, I’ll sit there and pull out the nerdy side, you know, and be like, Well, do you really want to know, I got the brain sketch right here, and I’ll put that up, you know, so that’s why I think I, what I call myself most specifically is an authenticity teacher. And, and whatever comes with that, so it’s if whether you’re doing group or you know, individual coaching, and I teach what are called the seven core pillars, so if we, so my company is aligned yourself. So if you to align with your authentic self means that you align with the life that you’re meant to live that your abundant life and you do it by, you have to address seven pieces, you have to address, your emotional self, your mental self, your physical self, your physiological self, your spiritual self, your social self, and your financial self. And if you are aligned in each of those, those pillars, then you will live a life of abundance, you know, and we always need tweaking and something, you know, it’s like, even for me, like, you know, my, my last pillar for me is the financial, I was just, I grew up in such a really limiting financial mindset. And it’s taken a really long time to, um, do those and replace it, you know, and, and it’s a constant process constant. So I don’t teach that piece in my coursework, like so when I you know, I teach the the pillars, I actually get other people to teach the financial piece, because I’m not there yet. So I’m what you know, it’s just like having a school. It’s like, I’m not going to teach every, you know, every course I’m going to teach the ones that I know, and then hire people to teach the ones that that can do a much better job, you know, so. Yeah, so that’s pretty much.
That’s pretty much what I do. And where can people find out more about you? So I’m on social media, I have my own website.
So my website is Dr. Laurie Monaco calm. My social media on Facebook and LinkedIn and LinkedIn. I’m at Dr. Laurie Monaco and on Instagram, I’m the badass Buta one. Tick tock, I’m the badass Buddha, Twitter, I think I’m Dr. Laurie Monaco. And then if you want to check out the talk show that we have, it’s the book I pick on, let’s say it’s on Facebook and Instagram, and it’s on YouTube, too. So yeah, um, you could find me just put my name in the Google search box and, and you will find me it’s the other lady named Dr. Laurie Monaco and she sells she’s one of those antique people that you know, like she, you go and you she appraises your stuff. And I just thought that was so fun. I’m like, What is the? How could she be Dr. Laurie Monaco too, and but she’s an antique appraiser. So that’s not me. I don’t know anything about antiques. So if you get her stuff, that’s not me.
Now, make sure to get all your information in the show notes and everything so easy for people to find you. Don’t want to leave with my I have lots of favorite questions. You’ll just hear me keep saying that. My favorite question, my favorite question. All your favorite are all my favorite because I get to talk to everyone that’s so amazing, including yourself. But the question is, are you ready for it? It’s another one of those hard ones. If somebody walked away with just that mic drop moment, what would it be?
Oh, gosh. I only could do a mic drop. moment when I’m in the moment, you know, and I’ve had them where you know, let’s see. It’s about it’s it’s it’s really just about embracing you know your authenticity. Be the best version of yourself. Period.
That’s it. Just be you.
That’s the mic drop,
just be you.
It is that simple but it’s not simple. It’s that simple. It’s it’s just be you and that’s it. That’s that takes care of everything across the board. There’s no nothing to hide behind. There’s no I’m going to be this way with this person. I’m going to be with the with this this way with this person. It’s so exhausting. Why do that. It’s just be you. There we go. I myself